Turtles Can Breathe Through their Butts


My husband and I went to my boys’ Zion Choir practice because we were the taxi, and the director had asked me to put together some kind of display for their theme.

After I fiddled with the display and worked out something simple, my husband and I took our seats at the back of the chapel to wait out the remainder of rehearsal.

To pass the time, hubby pulled out his iPad, opened the Trivia App, and we started reading random tidbits of useless, but oh so enjoyable information.

Things like:

•  The oldest word in the English language is Town.
•  Turtles can breathe through their butts!
•  There are more dogs than children in the city of Paris.
•  In Alabama, it is illegal to wear a fake mustache that causes laughter in church.
•  A mother Flamingo’s milk is red.
•  Oxymoron is itself an oxymoron because oxy means sharp, and moron means dull.
•  All shrimp are born male, but slowly grow into female as they mature.
•  Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories per hour (I’ll have to keep this in mind).
•  There are more Barbies in Italy than Canadians in Canada.
•  There are a million ants for every person on earth (who’s the guy counting?).
•  Because heat expands metal, the Eiffel Tower always leans away from the sun.
•  The flavor of Bubblegum is a combination of wintergreen, vanilla, and cassia (a form of cinnamon).
•  Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.
•  Baskin Robbins once made a Ketchup flavored ice cream (blugh!).
•  Earth is the only planet not named after a god.
•  The Lion costume in the Wizard of Oz was made from real lions.

Highly enjoyable stuff (it doesn’t take much to keep us entertained).

After a bit, I get the bright idea of sharing random trivia with Lauren, who is two states away at school (because she’s probably bored out of her mind, and lonely, and missing her mom, and wishing she were still in Zion Choir, and longing for some completely useless information to fill the void of her existence that is now college life).

So, I pull out my trusty phone, push the On button, slide the unlock, touch Contact, select Lauren, and type a piece of trivia.

•  Cherophobia is a fear of fun!


After it sent, I look closer at the screen, and to my HORROR, I realize I had sent it to THE WRONG ADDRESS. I inadvertently sent it to DR. HANE’s ORTHODONTIC OFFICE!!!

Apparently, his office had texted me an appointment reminder for my son, and in some weird loop/recall thing on my phone, his office screen came up instead of Lauren’s. Oh no!

I showed it to my husband, who started laughing uncontrollably. “They are going to think I am the dorkiest person on the planet!” I said to him.  He nodded and just kept laughing.  I begged him to take our son to the appointment in my place (which was the next day), but he wouldn’t do it. (When I went to the appointment, I ended up taking the seat in the corner next to the door so I wouldn’t be detected).

Needless to say, we both had a rolling laugh for the rest of rehearsal. My only comfort in this whole mix up was that at least I didn’t send Dr. Hane:

•  Turtles can breathe through their butts!

 Here’s hoping all of your communication finds its place with the right people.




They are starting to put ads on our blog. We do not approve these and are not getting any residuals whatsoever, so I apologize for the content. I’ll see what I can do about it.


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